Amnesia

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I wish one day i could wake up with amnesia,
Forget it all,
Take that final fall.
To forget the people who left,
And the people who tried.
Waking up every morning with a tear smeared face,
And a forced smile.
Dying to find a way to breathe,
And spending every breath hoping to die.
All those responsibilities left unfulfilled,
Where one’s fate is already sealed.
Dreaming to find a place to belong,
Trying to relate to that old song.
Worrying over what’s been said and what’s been done,
And then frustrated to the limit of caring for none.
Unashamed of showing those scars,
Never having the courage to break those bars.
Living amidst a perfect world,
Lying on bed trying to stop that heartache with legs curled.
Where no mistakes feel at home,
And abiding by rules is the common norm.
Those harsh nights and inside battles,
As the endless darkness settles.
Sitting on the basement floor,
Faking confident while shaking at core.
Hoping to receive one last call from the one i chose,
Still believing in that long lost cause.
All that kindness taken as weakness,
While the rude became the symbol of strength.
Having to build up that world of magic,
Because the real life was too tragic.
Looking for inspiration to the world outside,
While something irrelevant eating up the insides.
Having a warm heart with a smart brain,
But still disintegrated from all that pain.
Trusting some and then left to bleed, Planting that negative seed.
Weaving those baseless dream’s blaket to warm my heart,
Having  known its all useless from the start.
I  really wish i could forget it all,
But i guess you can only make a fresh start,
by accepting the past,
What’s gone is gone,
And you can only learn and move on.

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